Turning our shame into empowerment

I’m really excited to finally be about to share my short film with you all. It’s a film that’s really personal for me, and it’s been difficult to realise my vision for it, but now that I’m able to show it to people I know that it was the right thing to do.

The film is called Sacred Orgies and the Orgasm Field. The film is broken into four sections, and it charts my journey to understand the power of this work and hopefully helps explain why I’m so obsessed with self-pleasure and orgasms.

Why make a film?

At the end of 2019 – a different time that now almost feels like a different life – a yoga teacher friend of mine mentioned that he was getting some new photos done with a photographer in Madrid who specialises in movement photography.

I’m based near Barcelona, and Madrid is obviously fairly easy to get to, so it got me thinking about how this photographer could possibly help to showcase my work.

This is before we had to adapt everything to an online experience, so I was looking for ways to expand my tantra work beyond face-to-face workshops.

My initial idea was to create a promotional video – me, talking to camera about orgasmic shamanism. But the more I thought about it, and the more I bounced ideas off the photographer, the bigger my ambitions became. By the time we got to the day of filming, I’d booked a studio, I’d booked models, and I’d even booked a snake.

Crunch time

The day before we were filming, my partner gave me an ultimatum. He was concerned about me putting myself out there in an overtly sexual way. He told me that I had to choose between him and making this film – that if I went to Madrid and made the film then our relationship was over.

This was no small thing. We had been together for some time, we were planning our life together – there was a lot of love there.

I had to make a decision – hold onto the life that I had or become the person who I felt I was supposed to be.

I went to Madrid and I made the film. My relationship was over.

What’s the objective of the film?

When I look at this film now, I realise how vulnerable I was at that time. I’m really wearing my heart on my sleeve and sharing something that’s deeply personal.

The film is structured into four separate parts – four different stages of my journey. But it’s not just about me, I hope that it will be an opportunity for us to start a conversation – a conversation about how we relate to each other as humans, how we relate to the universe, how we relate to ourselves, and how we can reach our highest potential as humans.

Why is there a snake in the film?

I’d never been close to a snake before this filming. I was fairly apprehensive, but there’s more to the image of the snake than just being a cool prop.

A lot of the concepts that we explore in orgasmic shamanism are drawn from the mystery schools of ancient civilisations – Egypt, Greece, the Mayan people, and the Incan Empire. In the traditions of the mystery schools, the snake has always been a powerful symbol.

One of the most common ways that the snake is represented is the ouroboros – the snake eating its own tail. It is a powerful symbol of renewal, of rebirth, of transformation.

To me, the snake represents the death of the illusion of who we thought we were and the rebirth of who we really are.

Orgasmic shamanism is all about engaging with that energy, being willing to take that path and go on that journey.

It took us a little while to get comfortable with each other, but by the end of filming that snake and I had found a connection.

Why are orgies sacred?

Orgies are fun – they’re sexy and exciting. They’re not a new thing – the priests and shamans of the ancient civilisations used sex and intercourse and orgies as part of their spiritual practice.

If you’ve ever been part of an orgy, you’ll appreciate that the sexual energy that you feel when you’re in an orgy is really something quite unique and powerful.

One of the biggest orgies I’ve ever been part of was about ten years ago at a party in London. It was wild. As I was experiencing the orgy, it felt incredible, but the next day I was overwhelmed by feelings of guilt and shame.

My study of tantra in the years since has helped me understand not only the power of orgasms and orgies, but also the power of that shame that I felt.

At its root, the orgy can be the highest expression of our spirituality – it enables us to connect with our higher self. The energy released during an orgy can enable you to turn the darkness of your shame into a force of light that can lead you to the highest version of yourself.

That’s the potential that we’re exploring with orgasmic shamanism – engaging with your sexual energy, taking that path through the darkness, and embarking on that journey of transformation.

Be part of the premiere of the film at an online event on 28 November